An unusual holiday. Conflicts with my mother since her arrival to my house five months ago. The stress of two family deaths, one in October and another in November. I have been an extensive care giver to my friend and then his widow, along with my mother who requires constant guidance. Weeks of chest pain, physical and stress related I am landed into the hospital for Christmas Eve day and for the next few days. My mother is staying at my cousin's house not far away. My recovery consists of heart monitoring bed rest, no visitors and no stress. Heart congestion appears to be my old friend. So here I lie in bed blogging. I look forward to a new soon.
I carry your heart with me
I carry your heart with me (I carry it in
my heart) I am never without it (anywhere
I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) I want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)
By E. E. Cummings
I offer this to my close and giving friends, who have been with most of the steps along the way.